Tara: I will be taking PTO next week…
Harvey: We're screwed.
Bill: Request DEE-NIED!
Tara: I could very well show up on Monday and say I DIDNT GET MY DARNED PARIS VACATION AND I'M MAD!

Greg: I think I'm gonna weld this guy's mouth shut
Paul: I wish I could do that to you.
(Greg and Jim discussing Morrowind)
Paul: You two sound like a couple of nerds over there.
Jim: Not as nerdy as your new Casio watch.
Paul: Not as nerdy as those yellow pants you wear either.

Paul: Hey Greg, you got the Upscale Fem done? She got any extra bones?
Greg: You might open that file and look up her skirt, she might have a bone there.

Whitney: If I could count all the codpieces I've seen in this industry.

Monte: Is Prague in Germany?
Andy (months later): I think Prague is in the Netherlands

Bill: Monte! Where is that Unreal CD?
Monte (zoned, playing CS): Heh, heh…I knifed him, dude. Monte (to Clay - playing DX1 mp): Squat before you do it dude, seriously!
Ricardo (also to Clay): Drop it dude!
Monte (to Clay) Thanks, dude!

Ricardo: What the hell?! BM stands for bowel movement?

Chad: Why would you wear a Hawaiian shirt that isn't loud?
Alex D: Why would you wear one at all? Unless you're at a Jimmy Buffet concert.
Chad: In my mind, I'm always at a Jimmy Buffet concert.

Scott (sick, after taking a nap): I still feel like crap, but now I feel like wide-awake crap.

(After Alex D. goes to the mall for lunch to buy a DreamCast and locks his keys in his car.)
Ian: Next time buy your consoles at launch! The extra 100 you saved wasn't worth the trouble.

Warren: Well, Alex needs to talk to Dan, but maybe we should show them Deus Ex multiplayer first.
Randy: Right, shoot first, ask questions later.

Monte: Gosh dang this f*cking frame rate.
Steve: If you're going to say f*cking, then why use the gosh dang? Go for the gusto.

Harvey: Monte has slowly turned over to the dark side.

Warren (at Christmas):In my best of all possible worlds, we'd work a full day but, afterwards, head straight on home, canceling the party.

Harvey:Part of intelligence is knowing when someone else's version of reality is more accurate than yours.

Brian Glines: Where the hell's my shotgun?! Warren: We'll have these company meetings until everyone realizes they are a complete waste of time.

Warren (at a Friday meeting): We're thinking about taking the entire company to a movie at the end of next week.
Ian: Could we get a week's notice on that?
Warren: This is a week's notice…
Monte: This wouldn't be an issue if Ian had a chair. Bill: ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US.
Clay:: All your bonus are belong to us.